(cont.) favorite Peelz). I've co-written some short films with Jason F. and I co-write for The Junk Drawer. I'm actually a funny skipper on the World Famous Jungle cruise. And I've dabbled in stand-up comedy.

· INFLUENCES:   God, my family, my friends and (In no particular order) Steve Oedekerk, Bill Cosby, Steve Martin, Rowan Atkinson, Will Ferrell, Tom Hanks, Lewis Black, Jim Gaffingan, Ricky Gervais, Stephen Merchant, Jim Carrey, Martin Freeman, Steven Spielberg, John Pinette, Michael Dudikoff, Kevin Smith, Mel Brooks, The Zucker Brothers, and many more who I cannot recall at this time.

· FAVORITE "Maury" EPISODE:  Any of the "I've got a secret..." episodes. "Baby, you know how I spent every night with your brother...." .

· WHO'S YOUR SUPER-SECRET CRUSH? Jeff, because I think I actually have a shot with him...and Jessica Alba.

· FINAL THOUGHTS:  I make you laugh, just long enough to rob you blind.*
 
 

 
 
*This joke is not meant for blind people.

· FULL NAME:   Joseph Vernon Summers

· DOB:   December 29, 1982 (year of The Dog)

· EXPLAIN YOURSELF! I don't have to explain myself to anyone but God or my parole officer...and I don't think you are either! And if you are my parole officer...Larry, I'm sorry about March 8th... 

· COMEDY EXPERIENCE: I've been laughed at since I was born. (My sister asked to exchange me, so my life has been a comedy since day friggin one!) I've written two comedic short plays. I've appeared in a few TJ Weekly episodes (including the Czech

 (continued next column)